The Gathering

PRACTICAL JOKE IN HEATHROW

A couple of funny guys who’ve spent lots of time in airports, decided to pass som time at London’s Heathrow Airport by writing strange names on pieces of paper, and asking airport staff to page them over the PA system.

Afterwards, they waited under the speakers and taped the announcements.

To make their requests as believeble as possible, they dressed as taxi drivers when asking for help in locating their ”customers” approximately 40 minutes aftet the latest arrival of Thai Airways, Air India and so on.

They pretended that they could not pronounce the names themselves, in order to complete the ruse. They simply handed the papers containing the names to the poor receptionist.

They were forced to leave Heathrow after the fifth page, as Airport Security had gotten wind of what they were up to. The last taping was thus made at London Gatwick.

You can read the ”names” of the lost passengers below, and hear the tapings by double-clicking on the speaker icons. Please note that you must be using Microsoft Word for this to work.

Give these guys a prize for creative thinking )


Looks Like..............................(Read like)

Arhevbin Fayed and Bybeiev Rhibodie (I‘ve just been fired, and bye-bye everybody)

Aynayda Pizaqvick and Malexa Kriest (I need a piss quick, and my legs are crossed)

Makollig Jezvahted and Levdaroum DeBahzted (My colleague just farted, and left the room, the bastard)

Steelaygot Maowenbach and Tuka Piziniztee (Still, I got my own back and took a piss in his tea)

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bye...

THE MALE BRAIN!

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Stupid Duck

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bye...

There are 10 kinds of people: Those who can understand binary and those who can't.

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Luna Obscura (Atmospheric Death/Gothic Metal)
Their demo "Darcanda" (With the permission of Luna Obscura)
New album "Feltia" out: Soon in 2008!

A young priest was very nervous while his first mass, so he poured more few drops of vodka into the wine for relaxing. It worked!
On the second mass he did almost the same thing and he felt even better than the last time.
Next morning he found a letter on his desk:
"Dear Brother,
-Next time pour more vodka into the wine and not wine into the vodka;
-That huge "T" it's a cross;
-You must not call Judas "son of a bitch";
-It's Jesus on the cross, not Che Guevara;
-We've got 10 Perceptions, not 12;
-There were 12 apostles, not 10;
-Sinners will go to the Purgatory, not to Hell;
-Applauding believers was very nice idea, but you shouldn't have told them to dance macarena;
-Remember that a mess outlast an hour, not two half-times;
-And the last thing, that "guy in a red dress" wasn't transsexual. It was me, the bishop...".

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Chain me, Beat me, Cut me, Kick me, Whip me, Strip me, Burn me, EAT ME!
You'll just make me stronger!

hannn... poor ducks

they're so cute



i like this joke!

Ok, more jokes:
<NES> lol
<NES> I download something from Napster
<NES> And the same guy I downloaded it from starts downloading it from me when I'm done
<NES> I message him and say "What are you doing? I just got that from you"
<NES> "getting my song back fu***er"


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A man walks into doctor's office.
-"What seems to be the problem?" asks the doc.
-"It's... um... well... I have five penises." replies the man.
-"Blimey!" says the doctor, "How do your trousers fit?"
-"Like a glove."

***************

Two hydrogen atoms walk into a bar.
One says, "I've lost my electron."
The other says, "Are you sure?"
The first replies, "Yes, I'm positive..."

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A man takes his Rottweiler to the vet and says,
"My dog's cross-eyed, is there anything you can do for him?
"Well," says the vet, "let's have a look at him". So he picks the dog up and examines his eyes, then checks his teeth. Finally, he says
"I'm going to have to put him down."
"What? Because he's cross-eyed?"
"No, because he's really heavy"

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A sandwich walks into a bar.
The barman says, "Sorry - we don't serve food in here."

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra.

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A man walks into a bar with a slab of asphalt under his arm and says:
"A beer please, and one for the road."

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Chain me, Beat me, Cut me, Kick me, Whip me, Strip me, Burn me, EAT ME!
You'll just make me stronger!

Along that line...

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Yeah man, I tell ya what, man. That dang ol' Internet, man. You just go on there and point and click click click click click click. It's real easy, man.
- Boomhauer

Hahaha!!! I like it Cjays!!!

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Luna Obscura (Atmospheric Death/Gothic Metal)
Their demo "Darcanda" (With the permission of Luna Obscura)
New album "Feltia" out: Soon in 2008!

aaaaaahahahhaha i laughed my ass out with tish jokes!

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¿Hasta Dónde Se lavarán La Cara Los Calvos?

One of the last-created anecdote that is on in Britain:

If your wife gets into bed wearing a GREECE jersey, what is she trying
to
tell you?

There is NO f**king way you are SCORING TONIGHT!

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bye...

Five Germans in an Audi Quattro arrive at the Italian border.The Italian Customs Officer stops them and tells them "It'sa illegala toputta 5 people in an Audi Quattro."

"Vot do you mean it's illegal?" asks the German driver.

"Quattro meansa four" replies the Italian official.

"Quattro is just ze name of ze automobile" the Germans retort unbelievingly. "Look at ze dam papers: ze car is designed to karry 5 persons."

"You canta pulla thata one on me!" replies the Italian customs officer.

"Quattro meansa four. You have five-a people ina your car and you are thereforea breaking the law."

The German driver replies angrily, "You idiot! Call your zupervisor over. I vant to speak to someone viz more intelligence!"

"Sorry" responds the Italian officer, "He can'ta come. He's a busy with a 2 guys in a Fiat Uno."

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ROTFL!!!!!!

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Chain me, Beat me, Cut me, Kick me, Whip me, Strip me, Burn me, EAT ME!
You'll just make me stronger!

A 90-year-old man said to his doctor, "I've never felt better. I have a 18-year-old bride who is pregnant with my child. What do you think about that?"

The doctor considered the question for a minute and then said "I have an elderly friend who is a hunter and never misses a season. One day when he was going out in a bit of a hurry, he accidentally picked up his umbrella instead of his gun. When he got to the Creek, he saw a beaver sitting beside the stream. He raised his umbrella and went 'bang, bang' and the beaver fell dead. What do you think of that?" The 90-year-old said, "I'd say somebody else shot that beaver." The doctor replied, "My point exactly."

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bye...

http://fun.diadiktyo.net/stream54/powerpoint/Safety.pps


Hearing so many people speaking ill about his intelligence
level, George W. Bush decided to get his brain checked. The physician
diagnosis was:
- Mr. President, you have two brains, the left and the right,
like all normal people. But the problem is: in your left brain, there is
nothing right and in your right brain, there is nothing left!

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bye...

Weapons of Mass Destruction
1) Go to http://www.google.com

2) Type in "weapons of mass destruction" (DON'T hit return)

3) Hit the "I'm feeling lucky" button, NOT the "Google search"

4) Read the "error message" carefully. The WHOLE page.

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bye...

Or "french military victories".

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So many assholes...so few bullets.
-Ford Fairlane-

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Yeah man, I tell ya what, man. That dang ol' Internet, man. You just go on there and point and click click click click click click. It's real easy, man.
- Boomhauer

What's orange and sounds like a parrot?























A carrot

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bye...

go here

http://www.netkiffer.de/php/flash/growlkaraoke.php

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...AND I DON'T CARE
IF I SCRATCH THE WALL WITH MY NAILS
IF I TAKE THE NIGHT FOR THE DAY
AND I WILL CHOKE MY FACE
LIKE A BUG EMBRACE