About Epica: well, apparently this is the music Mark Jansen really likes to make, so I suppose in AF he was 'held back' by his fellow bandmembers. That would explain the rather subtle difference between the two bands, and how you can like one but not the other. Perhaps AF was just the right mix: Epica now puts the choir and classical influence a bit over the top, whilst, judging on Exordium, AF *may* be drifting off towards an Iron Maiden like style, which I personally do not like very much (but naturally I fully understand there are those who do
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I find the lack of emotion viewpoint very understandable. IMHO Epica is more concerned about their image than their music. They seem quite desperate to portray a 'gothic' image and being recognised as similar to WT, and the worst example of this is the Phantom Agony video, with singer Simone Jansen in cliche dresses (with deliberate-accidental 'breast views') and in 'interesting' poses in torture equipment. (And the less said about the other bandmembers' ridiculous SM masks, the better...
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Having said all that, strangely enough perhaps, I still find the actual music of the Phantom Agony album quite enjoyable, probably just because I like the classical/choir metal combination, and liked that part of AF the best. But I would put it nowhere near the way in which I like TG albums...
Now, I just heard on the Dutch forum that Epica fans on the Epica forum are very sensitive towards the slightest hint of criticism on what they doubtlessly consider the best band ever, so maybe if I feel mean I will post something similar like this on that forum in the future...